Violent temper tantrums and children
Many parents complain about the temper tantrums their children have I just think it is quite normal for many children to have them as a part of growing. Most children wish to express themselves and show their frustration and anger, but being young are unable to express it in the right way. It is quite common to see children throw temper tantrums when they are tired, stressed or have some physical, mental or emotional problem. However there is a cause for serious concern when certain children get really violent with hitting, screaming and throwing objects at home.
You would really get scared seeing a child bang or bump his/her heads with some children also hitting, pinching or biting or even trying to harm themselves. Some of these temper tantrums could turn more violent or longer and this could be a reason for great concern, and could also involve talking to a behavioral specialist or pediatrician.
Tackling violent tantrums in children
You need to first try to find out the reason why your child is turning violent in his tantrums. It is quite common that many children may indulge in such behavior out of frustration, or being overwhelmed or tired, while some may do it just to gain attention. The best attitude in most cases will be for you to not get too emotionally involved unless the child is bumping against anything sharp.
Most parents have been successful in handling the violent tantrums with just ignoring the tantrum and giving attention to the triggers of temper tantrums would help stop your childs emotions before it goes beyond a certain stage. This involves helping your child to recognize and manage his/her by suggesting some exciting activity afterwards will help one pull apart. Offering praise will help the child to not refrain from such behavior in future.
I have observed that many parents that yield to normal temper tantrums in children lay the foundation for more violent ones, as smart children realize it is the best way to get what they want. So being firm helps control your childs violent tantrums. Some things that have really helped are removing the things he/she throws or hits at, thereby communicating to him that his behavior is objectionable.
Being firm and consistent in your resolve and just calmly removing things that he/she could break and saying that you would talk to him/her once one is done helps. However this does not mean he/she should be left all alone, you need to keep an eye on the child. You need to be calm emotionally at the same time communicating to the child that you cannot be forced to do anything.
It pays for you as a parent to teach your child before going out, how to behave in public, and this is best done when the child is calm. It helps to distract children that start having violent tantrums, with removing them calmly and taking them home if they still misbehave as a punishment. You could play games that involve patience, following instructions and encourage more of interaction with other people when the child is calm, this would help children get over the habit of throwing violent tantrums and learn the art of adjustment.
It is true that all of us need our independence, so do children and tantrums are just ways that children learn initially to remove the blocks. However you should have a word with a specialist if your child turns real violent, is over 4 years of age, and all your attempts at tackling violent tantrums in children have not met with much success.